Paranormal Inactivity

This movie is a load of total horse and ushers in a new age of cinema where the audience is gradually and artfully bored into a state of total catatonia – so when anything does happen it seems amazing. It looks like it was filmed on an mobile phone (but that’s the point right?) featuring a gormless all American couple (he’s a day trader, of course his girlfriend is possessed, the wages of sin and all that) with nothing more than a copy of “Demoniac possession for Dummies – a reference for the rest of us” – to pass the time.

Also I could have improved the script. Sample below:

“I think this monster is trying to communicate with us” says he.
“Wow” says she.
“I’ll get a Ouija board so” says he,
“Oh, please don’t” says she. “Get an iPhone instead. Theres an app for that.”

[couple chuckle their last laugh together]
[enter guy with Ouija Board]

“Hi honey, I’m home!” grins gormless fool.
“How could you?” screams herself and storms out of house.

[He follows her and couple then realise that they are propagating tedium and throw them selves into nearest river]

[Demon gives up and gets day job in Micky D’s to pass time before being conjured up again by copycat script writer, he is confident he won’t have to wait long]

FADE TO BLACK..

Note: I am available for scriptwriting work. Am very reasonable (120,000 Euro per day). Make all enquiries to dialademon@imaginarium.net

I just can’t believe this tripe is so popular and the whole thing only highlights the triumph of mediocrity that epitomises modern life. The scariest demons of all are running our churches and waging resource wars around the planet. Is that not scary enough?

What this movie does show however is that people are desperate to believe in /something/ but do yourself a favour and avoid – surely there are better stories to tell?

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Published by

Joshue O Connor

Musical Web Monkey with a special interest in Web Standards. For more work stuff see http://www.cfit.ie. For more music stuff see http://www.techrecord.net

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